Married Life

The Proposal:

      I originally proposed on December 1, 2007 but didn't feel that it was official until I actually put a ring on Lakisha’s (Kisha) finger. I saw the perfect ring for her in New Jersey and only dreamed of buying it for her, but she was content with just knowing that I wanted to be with her for the rest of her life. Well unbeknownst to Kisha, I was planning along with my best friend to pop the question again and officially during our trip to New Jersey.

Friday.... 

      Kisha was under the impression that my best friends would be going to the mall to look at wedding dresses with her, but clearly that was just the decoy! I separated myself from them under the guise that I didn’t want to see her in the dress, but I was really going to pick out that perfect ring for her, the one I had found before I left.  They never actually made it to any dress shops but my mission was complete! 

Saturday 

      We woke ready to set up for the baby shower. We help set up, the party starts and everyone is having a good time...except for one problem, where to party that evening. To Kisha’s understanding we were going to T.G.I. Fridays (one of her most favorites places to eat) after the baby shower and then to a bar, but the group couldn't agree on the bar. So for far too long we went back and forth about where to go and finally a decision was made or so Kisha thought. So we ate and ate and ate and ate. The decision was made to not go to Fridays because we are all full! We go back to Laura's house (My best woman) to chill and drink a little. We were

Talking, drinking, and eating...then all of sudden we have to discuss where we are going again, which Kisha thought had already been decided. Kisha being the Florida Girl she was didn't want to go outside any more cause it was too cold! However, I was determined for her to come with me so she did! We made our way to the adjacent apartment and I started making this speech about the house we found. I was thanking everyone and Kisha was thinking WTF????? Next thing you know I was on one knee with a ring box in my hand and asking my soul mate to marry me! In shock she turned and walk towards the door! I know what you are thinking...but she was in shock! After processing the situation Lakisha turned back to me waiting on bended knee, answered me and sealed it with a kiss. 

August 15, 2009 

      On August 13, 2009 Kisha and I celebrated our two-year anniversary, two days later we sealed our love before God, our family, and friends. We sealed our love as a complete family as well. Family, yes we also have a 12-year-old (soon to be 13) son. During the ceremony the minister set a special section where Ajani took a vow alongside Lakisha and me. With our feet in the sand and surrounded by loved ones, we blessed the ceremony with blessing stones that were casted into the ocean. Then it was time to party!

      The reception went well and the toasts were of course emotional! However, the highlight of the wedding came after when we had a bon fire on the beach. The calmness of the water, clear skies, and what else is there to have but smores! The perfect ending to a perfect day! 
 
 

Married Life 

      I have now been married for 6months and life has been wonderful, but not perfect. We have had our ups and downs but our love has conquered that all. This past New Years we spent in New Jersey with my family and we had a blast. My wife and son saw snow for the very first time; we also went to New York City. Seeing their faces were priceless, the bright lights and skyscrapers, were enough for them, my son told me it was the best vacation of his life! That made me the happiest Dommy in the World! We are planning our first major family trip on a cruise to the Bahamas (none of us have ever been on a cruise), so I wonder if this will be my son’s second best vacation ever!  

      We currently live in the state of Florida, where not only is Homosexual marriage illegal, but domestic partnerships are as well.  If you know anything about domestic partnerships you know that this does not just affect the LGBT community, but everyone in Florida. As far as adoption laws, Florida is still the ONLY state that does not allow Homosexual to adopt. So legally, Ajani would not be considered my son.  

No worries … 

      My legal place of residency is in the state of New Jersey, and Civil Unions are legal there. To share a little bit of knowledge, you do not need to be from the state of New Jersey to have a civil union there, the only problem is when you return to your home state, unless recognized there, and your civil union will be useless. So why am I doing it? We plan on having more children as well as me adopting Ajani, which will all be done legally in the state of New Jersey, with hopes that one day it will be legal everywhere.

      One book that I recommend all committed LGBTQ couples to get is “A Legal Guide for Lesbian and Gay Couples”. It comes with a ton of information that can be useful in all aspects of your relationship. It also comes with tons of forms that you may find useful throughout your relationship! 

      Love is what you feel in your heart, not what people may feel is constitutionally correct. Our Love continues to grow, and I hope that one day everyone finds a love as strong as ours.

By: Casey Gross-Probus

Known in the land of Theta as Bruh Sophic